What a week this has been if you are a real human, and have been keeping up with the “ GOP Comedy Show “ known as the Republican “ Pick me, please “ tour. Of course, Rick Perry and Herman Cain have been the stars of the series, proving that even a higher education can still make one an A+ stupid.
David Letterman: "One by one the Republican candidate potentials have been shooting themselves in the foot making huge, horrible gaffes and they just look silly. It's gotten so bad that President Obama is now worried he may actually be re-elected."
"Newt Gingrich is so confident about his chances that he's already working on his concession speech."
"If we have to sit through any more of these Republican debates, I'm ready for a dictatorship."
"I'm thinking Herman Cain doesn't get it. He brought a date to the debate."
"Today it's 61 and foggy, like Rick Perry. But it's nice to see a guy running for President who's only groping for words."
"I'm worried about Rick Perry. For one, I'm worried that maybe he's too conservative. Two, I worry a little bit about his debating skills. And three, I — Oh, what was three?"
"Rick Perry forgets his own talking points, Herman Cain forgets every woman he ever groped, Mitt Romney forgets he used to be for everything he is now against; they don’t need debates, they need ginkgo biloba."
"It has gotten so bad in the party that Newt Gingrich is now starting to surge, which is never good news for Mrs. Gingrich."
Conan O'Brien: "Paris Hilton is more popular than Congress. And, like Congress, Paris's maximum capacity is 500 members."
Jay Leno: "Cain's only real foreign policy experience is from when he ran the National Restaurant Association and had to deal with the manager from the International House of Pancakes."
"People attending a Rick Perry event in New Hampshire had to prove they were American citizens. They asked a math or science question and if you get it wrong, you were born here."