Friday, March 23, 2012

Friday Funnies: Rick Sanitarium Edition


Conan O'Brien: Today is Ann and Mitt Romney's 43rd wedding anniversary. This means t

hat 43 years ago Mitt proposed to his wife and due to a weak field of candidates, she said yes."

“A photo of a shirtless Rick Santorum lounging in a pool is circulating on the Internet. Ironically, the photo has proven to be a very effective form of birth control.”

David Letterman: "Rick Santorum wants to ban pornography. That's one of the few thriving industries America has left."

Jimmy Fallon: "This weekend President Obama will visit the border that separates North and South Korea. Not to be outdone, Newt Gingrich will visit the border that separates the KFC from the Taco Bell."

"President Obama is calling on Iran to give its citizens better access to the Internet. Right now they only have one social networking site: 'Cover-Your-Face Book.'"

"Last week a tourist in Puerto Rico took a picture of Rick Santorum shirtless on the beach. I don’t want to say he looked chubby, but his new Secret Service code name is 'Newt Gingrich.'"

Bill Maher: “You know who hates March Madness? Rick Santorum. It combines the two things he hates most, college and putting something in a hole.

“Rick Santorum said this week that his 12-year-old could out-reason me about God. Look, I am not about to debate a home-schooled twelve-year-old. I have enough trouble with Sarah Palin.”