Posts
What a week for news of those Republican’s who are not running for the coveted presidential nomination. Sarah Palin decided that she will not seek the nomination even after a strong showing of support from everyone in her family. I would surmise that she also probably wasn’t raking in to much cash from her “ send me money, and I’ll tell you “ website. Maybe now she’ll go back to Alaska and kill off some other small town budget.
New Jersey Governor Chris Christie also decided that the run for the White House wasn’t worth his time either after he found out that there really was no McDonalds in the oval office… or a Dunkin Doughnuts… or a…
Jay Leno: "Sarah Palin announced she’s not running. Finally, a Palin who pulls out before it’s too late."
"They say Chris Christie decided not to get into the presidential race because he has no shot at winning. That’s not stopping President Obama though."
Jimmy Kimmel: "Sarah Palin will not run for president, which is good news for Palin-haters, but bad news for the moose population."
"Are you telling me that driving around the country in a bus with a giant picture of her face next to the Constitution was just a giant publicity stunt? I find that hard to believe."
David Letterman: "Chris Christie would have been the first American President visible from space. The Marine Band would have played 'Hail to the Chef.' If he'd run, the Republicans would have had to choose between him and Rick Perry. One's morbidly obese, and the other is morally obtuse."
Stephen Colbert: "Big changes in the Republican field. It's a 10-way tie for Not Romney."
David Letterman's "Top Ten Reasons Chris Christie Is Not Running for President"
10. As always, he's following his gut
9. Wants to spend more time with pie
8. There isn't a Quiznos within five miles of the White House
7. Afraid of going up against the Newt Gingrich juggernaut
6. Doesn't own a tie without a mustard stain
5. He was advised against it by his closest confidante, Duncan Hines
4. Constitution requires every candidate to be able to see their feet
3. Can't understand response because of chewing
2. Hank Williams, Jr. just compared him to Stalin
1. He was born in Kenya
0 Comments:
Post a Comment